𝚃𝚘𝚍𝚊𝚢, 𝙸’𝚖 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝙿𝚑𝚢𝚜𝚒𝚌𝚒𝚊𝚗,
& 𝙸 𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚌𝚛𝚒𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚎𝚜𝚝.
I advise, letting go of:
- The need to be understood
- The need to be liked
- The need to answer non emergency calls
- Screen time (Minimal)
My one job for Friday is to : 🆁-🅴-🆂-🆃
I tend to reject rest, even though this volume of my life is the most free time I’ve ever experienced.
What does that even me? How do I practice love when I reject what my body needs? Pardon me, I’m not talking to you lovely well rested folks, just me tapping away on the pearly throne at 4am.
It’s wild that grown me; decides to fight sleep like a toddler ragging and crying for a cozy place to rest their head, only to be silenced at the calm rhythmic surface of Daddy’s chest. But instead this bed will suffice, as I twist and turn, the glowing screen accompanying to no end.
Even laying in bed, just to lay here, feels odd, like I’m playing hooky, what have you done to earn such a sacred surface? However, it also feels odd defending it, like no, I’m grown, hush and enjoy it. If you don’t sit your behind down and enjoy the quiet moments. You betta lay in bed, breathe, look up at the ceiling like it’s the glowing nostalgic galaxy from the 90’s and pretend that you’re the grown up in charge.
Things I will not apologize for:
- Self Care
- Self Preservation
Fill in the blank darling, you’re grown.
We are humans, not machines. Even electronics need to be recharged.
Have you ever used your phone so much that it started to overheat in your hands?
Have you ever used your phone so much that your hands started to cramp and tingle in its set position?
Then you realized you needed to set your phone down and let it charge without browsing online. We humans need that too, we need a moment to recharge without the constant stimulation and browsing. We need to sit still and breathe.
It’s been difficult for me to rest, meditate and just sit in the quiet. I’m writing this post now at an ungodly hour, that’s usually when I get my best thoughts. As I think about rest, as I avoid rest, sometimes I write.
I want to relearn, because my system needs a reboot, an Anti virus sweep, the all natural way.
I am worthy of rest.
I am complete.
I am divine.
I am valuable.
I am precious.
I will rest so I can recharge and be a better version of me.